Dumped in a foreign country
It’s no fun being dumped in general, being dumped in a foreign country is not better I tell you. The boy-debacle was followed by a three-day-long pity party. It consisted of insane amounts of sleep, bad rom-coms and long contemplation sessions with Gabrielle’s Out Of Reach playing on repeat. If you are not yet familiar with this emotional masterpiece of a song, you’re welcome. Save it for your next heart break. Do you think I sound bitter? Maybe a little…
Eventually I came to realize that being cooped up inside, surviving on Mr. D (Mr. Delivery, food app) is not how I want to spend my time here, dumped or not. So, I picked myself up to go buy some warmer clothes as Durban has been surprisingly cold and rainy this October. I don’t mind though – it matches my current mood perfectly.
Shopping in Durban
I had envisioned spending the day shopping at the Pavilion, this grotesquely huge mall complex encompassing everything one might need to shop away one’s feelings. But sometimes you get what you need and not what you envisioned, seems to be a theme this trip. Anyway, I end up at Musgrave Mall, a much smaller complex with just the most necessary stores. Upon entering the first store, I am greeted by this super cool lady who just seems to be the whole vibe. After talking for 30 minutes while trying out sneakers, we decide to exchange numbers and go out dancing sometime soon.
For this reason and this reason alone I love this country. The people.
As I sit in the Uber I notice a tiny piece of red paper on the back of my phone. It’s a quote from a chai tea bag that I read once two years ago. Usually, I feel that these quotes are shallow one-liners meant to bring you some temporary joy. However, this one quote resonated deeply with me so I decided to keep it even if I, at the time, did not comprehend it. The quote reads “Empty yourself and let the universe fill you”. Well, lol. I am certainly doing the emptying part pretty thoroughly considering the life I just left behind in Sweden and every dream that fell apart when I was dumped in a foreign country. When is it time to start filling up?
Shopping in Durban
I had envisioned spending the day shopping at the Pavilion, this grotesquely huge mall complex encompassing everything one might need to shop away one’s feelings. But sometimes you get what you need and not what you envisioned, seems to be a theme this trip. Anyway, I end up at Musgrave Mall, a much smaller complex with just the most necessary stores. Upon entering the first store, I am greeted by this super cool lady who just seems to be the whole vibe. After talking for 30 minutes while trying out sneakers, we decide to exchange numbers and go out dancing sometime soon.
For this reason and this reason alone I love this country. The people.
As I sit in the Uber I notice a tiny piece of red paper on the back of my phone. It’s a quote from a chai tea bag that I read once two years ago. Usually, I feel that these quotes are shallow one-liners meant to bring you some temporary joy. However, this one quote resonated deeply with me so I decided to keep it even if I, at the time, did not comprehend it. The quote reads “Empty yourself and let the universe fill you”. Well, lol. I am certainly doing the emptying part pretty thoroughly considering the life I just left behind in Sweden and every dream that fell apart when I was dumped in a foreign country. When is it time to start filling up?
5 Tips for navigating Heartache on the Go
1. Comfort: Call a friend, cousin or whoever that is close to you. To be supported and seen by somebody that knows you can be invaluable when you are solo traveling far away from home. Thank goodness we live in a digital era!
2. Embrace solitude: Also, allow yourself time alone to reflect and heal. As much as other people help, you are your biggest support system. Lean into who you are and what you need when things are hard.
3. Connect with locals: Look around and see who wants to connect! Sure, this was not how you imagined your trip to go but is that a reason to let it go to waste? Plus: it is a lot easier to get new friends when you are not attached to people you already know.
4. Practice gratitude: This one I admit is hard to swallow at times when things are shit but I have honestly found it makes all the difference. I chose to be here! Focusing on what I can learn, and gratitude for everything I have, makes me feel better.
5. Indulge: Prioritize activities that bring you joy. For me, that is dancing! Going out for a social dance or dancing it out on my own in the kitchen, it doesn’t matter where as long as I’m dancing.
2 thoughts on “Post boy-debacle: the solo journey I did not expect”
So full of life 💗
<3 <3 <3